I’m talking about who or what you would rather sit beside on a plane—a fur baby or a human baby? Apparently, the majority of people would prefer their seat companion to be of the four-legged kind.
My choice—I would rather have an empty seat beside me, but that's not the question. I am a dog lover—don't put a cat near me. I've endured the child-rearing years, so unless it's my small grandchild, I don't want to go gaga over someone else's child fussing and crying or filling a nappy. As for a dog beside me, it would have to be totally cute (not a fuggly looking mutt that would win the ugliest dog contest). And I had a laugh when I read that some people would prefer to fly with a pet beside them rather than their own kids—obviously, their parental skills must be questioned if this is the case.
Humans and dogs have been friends for over 30,000 years, but nothing like the bestie cult happening now when pooches are humanized and doted on. Sleeping in their owners' beds, going out with the owner no matter where as a second appendage—perched in cafes munching on doggie biscuits while their owner sips coffee, lurking under a table in a restaurant at lunch, morning walks when the owner juggles a lead and shit bags whether steaming full or not and for some, it's sleeping in their owner's bed at night; it's definitely a dog's world! Dogophiles have become obsessed with taking their critters everywhere with them, now it’s on plane trips.
This trend first took hold courtesy of the Millennials (born between 1980 and 1994), who, for various reasons, are not playing the game of repopulating the world by having their required 2.5 children. Instead, they are opting for dogs that fit into their perceived idea of work-life balance without the dire commitment and responsibility that comes with having children. Other issues Millennials consider are the state of the world and the cost of raising a child. A dog or cat is the perfect solution to satisfy their paternal urges and have that unconditional love and companionship. Hence, the word 'fur baby' was put in the Oxford Dictionary in 2015. This increase in doggie love to the point of a delusional mania treating their dogs like human babies—doggy daycare, swamping social media with pics, massive spending on grooming in doggy parlors, gourmet food, and cute apparel as if the animal really is human—reared its head during the 1990s and has gone viral since then with Millennials now being dubbed 'Generation F.'
Service dogs on planes are formally trained to do a job and know how to behave in different social situations, as for everyone’s random animals being allowed on a plane, it’s a different story. These animals usually have no formal training apart from their owner’s whimsical approach to chastising bad behavior—the equivalent of helicopter parenting—overprotective and excessively involved. Some airlines allow you to buy a seat for your furry friend, while others insist the animal be put in a carrier bag under the seat in front of you. There are policies about how many animals can be on a flight and the size and weight of the animal, which is a small blessing for the other people on the plane.
Is a dog or a baby more disruptive?
Both cry, fuss, squirm, and whimper.
Both can be cute and quiet.
Both are prone to expel smelly odors. Babies cry when their stomach is full of gas and need a helping hand from the parent to get rid of it. Dogs, on the other hand, let loose with obnoxious farts from swallowing air while panting if stressed—no helping hand required. Other bodily functions that babies and dogs are prone to without any sense of decorum (vomiting and shitting) depend on how the 'parent' has handled their pre-boarding routine.
Licking and drooling are predominantly doggy traits while sneezing and slobbering are the human equivalent. Babies and dogs do not use the accepted social grace of a handkerchief for effluent droplets or dribbles.
Only dogs can trigger an allergic reaction in a human. The allergic reaction is to the dog's dead skin cell protein, saliva, and/or urine accumulating on the fur or hair along with pollen and dust mites. Did I mention fleas—ugh. Also, some dogs shed hair ad nauseum; who would want to be covered in dog hair during a flight?
A baby's gummy bite is nothing compared to a dog deciding to take a chunk out of a person. In 2015, Barbara Streisand's doggy companion (on a private flight) decided to bite the hand feeding her, the flight attendant’s. The flight attendant was chastised for not showing the dog her hand before feeding it. The World Health Organization estimates that tens of millions of people are bitten by dogs annually in the world.
Just as I do not like cats, some people don't like or have a phobia about dogs or babies. Cynophobia (fear of dogs) or pedophobia (aversion to children, including babies) are two types of phobias that can range from a mild aversion to overwhelming anxiety. Hopefully, these souls fly in their own jets to avoid such a traumatic experience as sitting beside a dog or a little person.
So, which seat on the plane would you prefer—sitting beside a dog or a baby?
Gail Palethorpe, a self proclaimed Australian gypsy, is a freelance writer, photographer and eternal traveller. Check out her website Gail Palethorpe Photography and her Shutterstock profile.
